My Dog is a Karen – Christmas Entitlement
Happy New Year everyone,
Christmas morning brings out the giddy and early rise from bed unless you are older than 12. I hear people say dogs equate to toddlers and cats to teenagers. Our dog carries the toddler gene and wakes well before anyone else. Jumping on the bed and bouncing on mom and dad to wake us up.
Ginger bounds down the stairs and sniffs all the gifts under the tree as if to say, “This one mine, this one mine,” and so on for each gift under the tree. Then a smell catches her nose and springs to the front door where the stockings hang. Mom ambles down the stairs, “That’s not yours!”
With a cup of tea for mom and dad, Ginger anxiously awaits an hour for her human sister to drag herself out of bed. As most humans do, she heads for the bathroom and the first flash of karen manifests directly in front of us. Ginger runs up the stairs and starts a whining protest at the bathroom door. My daughter returns to her room and Ginger moans with unsettled grievances.
The sheer delight emits in a dance of circles and hops to see her sister come out holding a box. “That’s mine” translates from the ear-piercing squeal coming from the prancing dog. Great joy fills karen as she gets her way. Sister places the box on the floor open side down. Ginger tries her best to open it or flip it. But without opposable thumbs, it proves impossible. The second karen instant of Christmas morning arises with cries of injustice. I kick the box over and Ginger dives into the open top and pulls out two new toys.
The third karen incident begins with Ginger wandering the kitchen looking for spills and drops while I cook. The two hours of cooking build with me yelling louder every five minutes, “Get out of the kitchen!” She slinks away grumbling under her breath about how unfair I am for kicking her out as she runs up to protest to mom.
As we watch Christmas Vacation in the evening every Christmas Day, the fourth karen moment of the day appears. Don’t watch a movie with a karen more interested in playing with her loudest new toy. Mom finally hides the toy under her blanket. After trying to uncover it for five minutes, she whines to me about her confiscated toy. “Sit and watch the movie,” sternly leaves my lips between laughs. Ginger, our resident karen, grumbles under her breath which I will not translate in polite society.
I hope everyone had a delightful and loving Christmas and wish everybody a happy New Year.
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