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My Dog is a Karen – Lord Protector

Happy Friday Everyone,

Despite the couch inexplicably exploding four times in the past week all over and around Ginger, my family convinced me to give her a karen rebuttal for this past month’s blogs. Here is her story as I overheard it as she complained to her human mother.

Dad has been calling me Lord Protector of the House. I don’t know what that means but it sounds fitting and so I will use it as my new title.

Dad takes Mom out of the house. They leave and spend most of the day away from home where she is protected by me. Did he ask me whether she may go? Of course not, because he is a manifestation of the disobedient old man doing whatever he wants.

He drives my precious mom out of the drive and disappears down the road. They leave for hours upon eternity before returning. I greet them at the door trying to hug Mom and showing my concern only to hear, “We were gone for twenty minutes,” from Dad in a condescending tone. Like that was to comfort my distress of worry.

They carried bags into the house and naturally being the Lord Protector of the House, I should inspect and make safe any goods entering. Did I receive praise for my diligent work? No, all I heard was, “They are not for you,” and “Get off the counter.”

The worst happened last week when everyone left the house leaving me to patrol alone for whole the day. Dad ambled home with a bag full of parts and no Mom. “Where is mom?” I barked at him. With no answer coming, I run to the front window and no sign of her there. I was sure the monster left her in the cold without a ride alongside the road.

Just as the bleakest hour settled upon me knowing Mom would never enter the house again and my heart broke into a mournful cry. The sound of my sister pulling into the drive brightened my day and Mom got out of her car. Sister found Mom walking aimlessly along the road and rescued her from impending death. (Author’s note, Mom left with sister for shopping an hour before I left.)

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About the picture: It is tiring being the Lord Protector of the House.

My anxiety rises with less than a month to the release date. I believe most of the errors are out of the book. Please help me perfect Death to the Devil’s Dragon by reading it for mistakes and letting me know. Email me at: for a free copy.

God bless,

Danny Mac

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