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My Dog is a Karen – Ginger’s Rant




Happy Friday Everyone,

 

Married nearly thirty years, I found life goes smoother when the wife is happy. Tammy likes my dog stories, especially the ones where Ginger voices her concerns over her maltreatment and my failure to recognize her royal leadership of our house. Merry Christmas to my loving wife, here is Ginger’s rant in her own words.

 

Dad is at it again. His total lack of respect shown to me burns me up. This week demonstrated a total lack of regard towards me and my ever-alertness to the dangers surrounding my home. The other day, he would not let me out because the neighbor's dog was wearing fighting clothes. Only I knew this meant he was preparing for war against my subjects I allowed to live with me, and I considered kicking him out of my family.

 

The whole family left me home alone last week for most of the day. Dad comes home without Mom. “How could you leave Mom without my protection? Where did you take her?” My duly noted anxiety of Mom not coming home with him is met with a nonchalant, “I was only gone a half hour,” and “She went Christmas shopping with sister,” as he put away the groceries.

 

My Dad is still breaking my cookies in half for the last pee-pee of the day even though millions of my adoring fans request him not to do so. My friends, it gets worse than that. The other day he held his hand like it held a treat to entice me to follow him. I quietly walk behind him and sit patiently while he hooks the leash, and it totally shocks me when he opens his hand. It’s void of any treat. There is no cookie at all in the empty hand of this devilish conniver.

 

After this last stunt, I determined to kick him out of the family at this latest show of rudeness, but then he scratched me on my head. Mom and Sister have a loving, fun rub, but a Dad scratch dives deep into my skull. It tickles my brain and sends shivers down my back. My eyes roll up to the top of my head to meet the deep massage entering my soul and decide to keep him for another week. I can’t kick him out because he is the only one to give deep scalp scratches to soothe my heart.

 

About the picture: Ginger staring intently for Mom and Sister to arrive home safely.

 

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God bless,

Danny Mac

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