My Dog is a Karen – Dad is Mean
Happy Friday Everyone,
This past week consists of grumbles and cold furry shoulders because Ginger is upset with the lack of attention in last week’s blog. It doesn’t matter if the devotion goes to mom, it isn’t about her. So, this week’s blog expresses Ginger’s karen rant about me.
Dad proves he is the meanest in the house. He blames me for happenings outside my control. For instance, dad covers the couch with a protective blanket. He tucks the cover tightly removing all wrinkles. Sure it looks pristine when done. The strain from tightness makes it look smooth means one little touch from me and poof it explodes all over me. Then as I try putting back, he calls me a karen and tells mom on me.
Sometimes, it becomes possible to sleep on the cover and a simple rollover causes it to spring out of its perfectly positioned constraint, and again it falls on top of me. He complains as if he lays in the same position all night. Do I receive tender mercies for having lived through the fright of having the cover explode on top of me? No, he yells at me and tells me to get my furry butt upstairs.
The second meanest thing he does is break my snacks in half. I manage one treat a day and this cheapskate breaks it in half to save a penny. I help Scrooge by eating the bits and crumbs falling from the counter from his messy cooking and he breaks my only reward in half. He rewards half a cookie for protecting his sorry self from the evils in the world like murderous chipmunks, killer robins, and evil delivery trucks on a daily basis.
The final act of meanness is so terrible, I hesitate to tell you about it. The other night while tucking my royal blue blanket around me for a night’s sleep, he leaves one of my ears open to the chill of the night. A polite moan fails to point out his lack of attention to detail. Instead, I hear, “Quit complaining and go to sleep.” Who can possibly sleep with one ear left open to the night air of the frosty bedroom floor? This callous man maliciously climbs into bed and shuts off the light with one of my ears subject to frostbite and amputation.
How am I the karen when these are only the tip of the iceberg of abuse in this house? Yet, being the ever-faithful dog, I serve them without complaint or regard for my safety.
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